I arrived here 8/9/10. It has been over a month.
Yesterday, I gave some papers to a man about St. Edelweiss. It may not be a good idea, but I felt different after I wrote them out, so maybe I will write more of these things out, for me. There's a great deal of things that I'd like to forget, and that have been forgotten for me, but there are many things that should be remembered. Someone should exist who remembered those things.
A man with long red hair. A leader. He was cut open and a rosary was tangled in his guts and sewed up there, to try and force secrets out of him, but he wouldn't speak.
A boy with short red hair and an eyepatch. He was funny, and roomed with someone very bad. He was reckless and I always had to worry. He seemed to lose himself near the end.
A boy with blond hair and green eyes. My friend. Angry. He forgot us. He was important.
Four siblings gutted and stuck on a wall, with another unrelated breathing amongst them, to fall down after two days. Simply to terrify us, I must now believe.
A man tortured on the intercom. Screaming. Terrifying.
Not allowed to speak my language.
Not enough to eat. Cold.
Matt is here. He knows people here.
I'm going to school.
This world is such an open place. It's very different. People complain about the Pull, about the injustices here, and all I can think of is how much worse off we could be. None of them know how lucky they are.
I don't know if it's exactly fair to say that. People are taken to laboratories and used for experiments here, too. It's not a safe world, either. I suppose no world really is. Is it wrong, to be so relieved to have escaped? I hear about those people, and all I can think is "at least it's not me". I think I was close to failing there.
Matt died in the asylum, but he's here now. Maybe that means that all the other people who died in those rooms went to other worlds, too. I hope they're safe, somehow.
Yuffie is here now, but she just remembered it after being here for a long time. So is Jack.
The situation is strange.
What if everyone in this world was in St. Edelweiss beforehand too? What if they're all like Yuffie, the memories just aren't there somehow, and they might come back?
A kind boy with white hair and a strange arm and a marked eye who suffered.
A guard with pink hair (I can't be misremembering it) and points.
A man with black hair and blue eyes who helped me.
How many people are there? Which of them are important to bear remembering?
Are they in other worlds now? Are they all right?
--- (pretend there's not a break of like a year here.) ---
Parfait is good. I don't know. This is all confusing and awkward.
Now I have been a cat. That's a new one.
I saw Sasuke today. He was standing behind a glass window and I barely saw him. It was like he stayed long enough for me to just glimpse him and then he was gone. M said he was OK - it sounds like this is happening to others. It must be a trick of this place. Making send-offs of us.
People wonder why I can't believe in anything here.